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Dear gigolo and kiss-o-grams. I don’t know about you, I get stressed easily. When I get all riled up, and I can’t stand still, and I sit comfortably. It’s usually time to check my underpants. My knickers will always end up being in a twister. And Oh. Real men wear G-Strings.

How to check if you are all riled up

1. Stand up

2. Take off your trousers/skirt/shorts/overall/space suit

3. Take off your knickers

4. If you are riled up, your pants will be in a twister

5. If you are really riled up, your pants will be in several twisters

6. Also check if you have shat yourself from the stress

7. If you are wearing boxers, you have been doing it wrong

8. Buy a pair of G-Strings if you are wearing boxer shorts

9. Ask your loved one to buy you a pair of G-Strings if you are in a relationship

10. Sexy little numbers that do not cover anything are preferable

11. Do not get too excited in case you piss yourself

12. Work out your butt and show off your glutus  maximus

13. If your knickers are in a twister, de-clench your stress

14. Unload and relax your muscles

15. Put your straightened G-Strings back on

16. Walk normally


This scatological  tutorial is brought to you by Linus & The Feel Good Factory.